It happens. We all backpedal. We all slip back. We all have moments where we may say or do something not very "spiritual". But how do you know when your spirituality is suffering? Do you have an aching pain inside yourself that you can't explain? Are you acting out of character more often than not? Are people in your life disappearing? Are you left confused and wondering why you are being abandoned or "left out"?
All it takes to get back on the track of healthy spiritual growth is acknowledgement of the fact that your spirituality is suffering. That's it. Once you see and acknowledge it, healing- true healing can begin.
Here are some signs that this may be what's happening to you:
You refuse to take responsibility for your actions.
Are you someone who is usually very self aware and quick to apologize for any harm you may cause, but instead have recently begun pedaling blame for the things you do onto other people? You may not notice that you are doing this, so you have to take an honest look at your behavior from a 3rd person perspective. Sometimes it is easier to see misbehaviors in ourselves if we look at ourselves as if we are looking at someone else. Refusal to take responsibility for our actions is a major sign that something within us has shifted, spiritually. And we can rest assured, people will notice when we do this.
Your social life seems to be suffering for no apparent reason
People around you- your friends, family, acquaintances- have stopped calling or texting. They have stopped inviting you out for social hours or dinners. You begin to notice that you are not being invited to parties and gettogethers, when you would have before. You don't understand why no one is inviting you out anymore. Take a look at how you treat people, and how other people **see** you treating people.
You find and enlist a "scapegoat".
A "scapegoat" in this situation would be someone whom you blame for the things going wrong in your life and within yourself, even though those things are your fault. That last part is important. If someone IS at fault for some harm they caused you, this doesn't apply to them.
This scapegoat could be someone you have perceived as having wronged you in some way, although they may have actually been wronged by you. Despite the pain you may have caused them, you continue to blame them for the perceived wrong-doings towards yourself. They have become the "scapegoat" that you can use so you do not have to look at yourself and the pain or hurt you have caused other people. If you find yourself blaming one person for a majority of the wrongs in your life at the moment, take a serious look at your part in whatever the situation is. Are you taking responsibility for your part, or blaming the entire situation on the other person (if there really is a situation)? Are you making up the situation in its entirety? Sometimes we do these things without even realizing it- especially when we have strayed so far from our spiritual path.
You seem to be hurting deep inside and don't understand why.
When we build a strong or even remotely strong spiritual path for ourselves, and that spirituality begins to suffer for whatever reason (reasons could include: traumatic experiences, new relationships, death of a loved one, new home, losing a home, etc.), we can begin to feel pain in our spirits and within ourselves. Our spiritual paths are such a core part of who we are and to lose part of that can be devastating.
If you are hurting inside and don't understand why, take a look at your practice to see if you've been neglecting it in any way. If you notice that there is a part of your practice you haven't been doing, start immediately or as soon as possible. Maintaining that connection to your Creator/High Power/Higher Self is crucial to your wellbeing.
Did any of these signs that your spirituality may be suffering resonate with you? If so, you are welcome to reach out to me for advice on how you can heal and get back on the right track. If you are not comfortable reaching out to me, please reach out to someone who walks with you on your journey who may be able to offer you advice.
There are some good bits of advice included in this post and they will be a great place to start. Feel free to comment below if you think there was something that should have been included in this list.