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Discovering Your Inner Strength

Even though life can be a fantastic ride, sometimes it can also knock the wind out of your sails. When tough times trigger your insecurities, you can discover an inner strength that will get you through practically anything.

Try these ideas to get started:

1. Reflect on the tough times you've had before. Ask yourself how you got through it. What did you do? What did you think? What did you tell yourself? Your resilience will become evident as you do this exercise and give you real hope for the future in dealing with other obstacles. Write and journal as you reflect. This can help you really see your strength.

  • Recognize that you've made it through those difficult situations. Then think about what you're experiencing right now. Is the current situation similar to or much different from your other tough times? Use what you've learned from your past challenges.

2. Learn to talk to yourself in positive, encouraging ways. This will help you build up your inner strength.

  • As if speaking to your own best friend, tell yourself what will most help and encourage you. What do you most want to hear? What do you need to hear to help gather your strength? Is there something specific you're hoping will happen? Avoid negative self talk.

  • Practice providing yourself with encouraging, uplifting messages. The messages you give yourself can be less than helpful or they can propel you through the roughest of circumstances.

  • Talking to yourself with respect, care and positivity builds your inner strength so it's there when you need it. When the going gets tough, you'll have yourself to fall back on.

3. Allow yourself time to think through whatever the situation is. It's okay to feel confused.

  • What are your ideas about how to weather the storm? Examine all the solutions you can come up with. Explain to yourself what you'll do and how you'll do it.

  • A sense of your own resourcefulness can be found in your ability to problem-solve through challenging situations.

4. Consider who you regard as role models or mentors. You selected those people because you respect and admire them. They're strong enough people that you want to emulate them.

  • Think about their strength of character. How do you know they have it? What does that strength look like? How does it manifest?

5. Reflect on what you've done or been through that you're most proud of. Was it making it through college although you had to work while you attended classes? Maybe it was moving out on your own for the first time and figuring out you could take care of yourself.

  • Even though you might have felt afraid, uncomfortable, lost, or confused, you discovered your internal resources and made it through those experiences.

  • When you examine what you did to handle those situations and how you made it through, you'll recall your inner strength.

  • You can get in touch with your own resourcefulness by re-visiting those events that bring you pride.

6. Sometimes, you've just got to "fake it till you make it." You can probably recall a time when you felt afraid or weren't sure you could succeed, but you stood up and met the challenge head on. This is a great tool to just get you through the moment, and help build your confidence.

Discovering your inner strength is possible, even in the toughest of times. Following the steps above will help you discover your courage and resourcefulness. And with this self-understanding, you can handle anything!

You can help yourself build your inner strength during times that are not hard, by simply learning to be kind to yourself. You are truly all you have, you are the only person you can count on 100%. You are also with yourself 24/7, so learn to not speak negatively to yourself. When you do, apologize immediately. You don't have to say it out loud, but you must apologize to yourself. When you have developed a kind relationship with yourself, you can be your biggest cheerleader when times get tough. It will be much easier to say "you've got this!" in those difficult times.

One last thing I would suggest, is leave affirmations for yourself where you will see them when you first wake up and throughout the day. My favorite way to do this is to take a dry erase marker, and write a kind message to myself on the mirror in the bathroom where I will see it immediately upon waking. You could also write affirmations to yourself on sticky notes and have your spouse leave them in places where you will see them, but not tell you where they are so they are a surprise. You want them to be in your handwriting because you are learning to be kind to you.

Have you used any of the tools above? What was your experience? Feel free to share in the comments below!

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