So, I pretty much dropped off the face of the earth for a little while, and I feel like I owe everyone an explanation.
Basically, I had a bit of a breakdown— spiritually and emotionally. Nothing major; but I became extremely overwhelmed with everything I was trying to do. I also became burdened by the thought that I had been using copyrighters to publish content on my site. While there is nothing inherently wrong with that, it became the biggest spiritual issue I faced. I felt like a fraud. I had invested in a tool that I intended to use if I was in a bind, or if I was crunched for time but it became something I used to try and get ahead of the game. And I had no idea that this was what was wrong and why I broke down until I received this message in a recent meditation and suddenly it all made sense.
You see, I wanted to have already arrived at the destination I had in mind for myself and this business. I wanted to be there, where I was helping people and was successful. I lost sight of the fact that the journey getting to that point is just as important (if not more so) than the destination.
I have been meditating on this, and this is the answer I received from my guides. I also must continue working on myself and honing my skills and my abilities before I can truly help others.
In an effort to be transparent, I am going to list some truths about me below:
I am a Level III Reiki Master Teacher. BUT, I haven't practiced. I feel lost. I received all three attunements over the course of a weekend and was given basic knowledge of how to practice. Because of this, I have always felt "not ready". I don't blame my teacher for this; this is one path to Reiki and a lot of people take it. I adore my teacher-- she is amazing. For me personally, though, I feel like I needed more in-depth instruction. That's just how *I* work. And she is a day's drive away so- basically inaccessible.
I am also attuned to level IV Reiki and Tibetan Reiki systems.
I am an ordained minister through Universal Life Church which allows me to legally perform Reiki (hands-on healing).
I am a certified Meditation Practitioner and Teacher.
I do not think I have a good meditation leader voice. I have always been self-conscious of that.
I have written and recorded several guided meditations (that you can find on this website).
I have a set of 7 crystal singing bowls, each tuned to a different chakra. I am currently learning from them, the best way to play them and use them.
I did not finish my Life Coach course. I was a little over halfway through when the breakdown occurred...
I want to save the world. I want to help everyone I come in contact with heal themselves, though I know I can't. Right now and for the past few months I have been focusing on myself and healing myself. I am still not "there" yet, but I am closer than I was and I finally received the message that it was time to come back here and provide an explanation to everyone why I basically fell off the face of the earth.
What are my plans?
Right now, my plans are to keep it simple.
I want to clean up this website a bit. Change things around.
I have a few Reiki sessions scheduled and I plan to do them.
I am continuing to meditate regularly and getting to know my singing bowls.
I will FINALLY begin offering free beginner meditation classes over Zoom. I have to overcome my fears and just do it. This will not be right away, but I plan for that to happen within the next couple of months.
I am going to keep everyone posted here on how things are going.
For now, completing the Life Coach course is going to be put on hold while I continue honing the skills I already possess and get used to practicing Reiki.
If you read this far, thank you. 🤗 I appreciate you and your support more than you could ever know. I am learning to honor my journey and honor Spirit within me-- and Spirit within you.
Feel free to leave a comment below if you'd like.